22

It was bound to happen eventually. I love T. Swift too much for this not to happen. I am currently sitting in my bed (shocker) listening to YouTube. In a recent post I mentioned music and how much I enjoy listening to it. Taylor Swift is playing on loop the song 22. When I say this was bound to happen I meant that since we are all 22 now (well except you Megan but hey less than a month now!) and are the perfect audience for Taylor Swift songs saying as she is only a year older than us, then I had to write a post about what it feels like to some degree from my perspective.
T. Swift got it right with the following lyrics,
"We're happy, free, confused, and lonely at the same time.
It's miserable and magical."
I have been having many very mixed emotions lately. Everyday is a new adventure full of feelings and insight. For instance I went to my folks house on Monday. It was an adventure to say the least, it takes four hours to get to their house when traffic is in my favor. I had so many feelings going through me that day. The biggest emotion of that adventure was confusion. How did things end up the way they are now? Why is growing up so hard? Why are people the way they are? Can things be changed? All of these questions with no answers, it was a bit overwhelming. There were many times that I almost turned my car around and headed back to Berea. I am glad I didn't though. I may never know the answers to ease my confusion. Another adventure of this week was going to church Wednesday night. I felt overwhelmed with happiness because of the children I work with on those nights who are learning more about God each and every time. It is an amazing experience watching their faces light up with the joy that comes with knowing Jesus. On that same story I am also free. In many senses of the word I am free. I am free to do what ever I want to do with no person or thing holding me back. I can get my Master's Degree in Social Work or I can rob a bank if I so desire. Part of being free to do whatever it is I want is to realize and see the pros and cons of my actions. No longer am I able to let others make decisions for me, at 22 years of age I am expected to know what to do with my life. Most of the time however I don't know what I am doing and I just try and let God lead me where He wants me to go.
When you are 22 there are no more big milestones to hit or look forward to. I can drive, vote,  buy cigarettes or alcohol, join the army. All those things adolescents look forward to, they have already passed me by. Sometimes it really bothers me. I feel like I am stuck between being a child and an adult. Where is my place. Where do I belong. I can no longer get away with feigning innocence like a child but older adults don't seem to take me seriously because "I am not old enough to have experienced the world like they have". Hearing people say you're not old enough to know what it's like or saying you're too old to watch that movie makes me feel miserable, confused, and a little lonely even.
But I don't let those moments drag me down too much because I have friends who love me and accept me and my quirks. I have a spot and at least in that simple aspect of friendship in my life I know where I belong. When I am with Cathy, Clare, Megan, and Sarah I can be happy, free, confused and lonely at the same time, as T. Swift put it so plainly. I can be me and not worry about being too young or too old and just live in the moments magical or miserable may they be.
Hey I don't know about you, but I'm feeling 22!
Signing off for now,
Captain Something Fun

Of course I have to add a link to the music video for the song that inspired this post.

T. Swift- 22

Music

I love music! I wouldn’t call myself a fanatic or anything like that. As I am sitting here alone in my room twisted sisters “We’re Not Going to Take It” is playing on my youtube channel. With technology it is so easy to access music from decades ago and pull it up within seconds without even paying a dime to hear it. I love it! I have gained an appreciation for music in my twenty something years of existence. I do not have a favorite genre. Depending on what type of mood I am in determine what is playing in the background. My best friend tells me she can tell what type of mood I am in based on what is playing through my speakers. I would say that most of the time she is pretty accurate too. For example if I am in an upbeat get up and go do something type of mood, you will hear anything from The Beatles to John Mellencamp to Taio Cruz, Fun, and T. Swift blaring through my speakers. If I am in a reminiscent mood, you will hear a lot of 90’s and early 2000’s music playing through like music from The Goo Goo Dolls, Bon Jovi, REM, Shaina Twain, Backstreet Boys, Destiny’s Child, and Matchbox Twenty just to name a few. I don’t know how to describe the feeling for this next category. When it hits me I just call it my 80’s feeling. A lot of Cher, Cyndi Lauper, Madonna, Twisted Sisters, and Queen plays during those times. When I am down or stuck in a funk I play a lot of what my best friend likes to call “teenage angst” songs. You will typically hear a lot of Simple Plan, Good Charlotte, and Matchbox Twenty. For the final mood category I will mention in this post, I am dedicating it to my favorite female artist. I guess you can call this my girl power music. T. Swift, Avril Lavigne, Pink, Shaina Twain, Kelly Clarkson, Alanis Morissette, Carrie Underwood, and Martina McBride play through during these times.
I would now like to make a list of songs that fit with specific moods you may be feeling. So here it goes
1. Happy- “Happy” by  pharrell williams
2. Falling in Love- “I’ll Be” by Edwin McCain, “I want it That Away” by Backstreet Boys, “Jack and Diane” John Mellencamp, “Call Me Maybe” Carly Rae Jepsen
3. Hopeful- “There Will Be a Day” Jeremy Camp, “I Won’t Give Up” Jason Mraz, “Livin on a Prayer” Bon Jovi, “Better Days” Goo Goo Dolls, “Get Back Up” Toby Mac. “Carry On” Fun,
4. Lazy- “The Lazy Song” Bruno Mars
5. Go Getter- “Do Something” Matthew West, “Run This Town” Jay Z, “I want To Ride My Bicycle” Queen,
6. Winning/On Top of the World- “We Are The Champions” Queen, “Some Nights” Fun
7. Regretful/Guilty- “6 Degrees of Separation” The Script, “How To Save A Life” The Fray, “Apologize” One Republic
8. Heart Broke- “Breakeven” The Script, “We are Never Getting Back Together” Any T. Swift song (legit if you are a girl especially), “Skyscraper” Demi Lovato, “ Just A Dream” Carrie Underwood “Just a Dream” Nelly
9. Tired- “Asleep” The Smiths, “Worn” Tenth Avenue North, “Busted Heart” For King and Country, “I’m So Tired” The Beatles
10. Confused- “Complicated” Avril Lavigne, “Untitled” Simple Plan, “Slide” Goo Goo Dolls, “Story Of My Life” Bon Jovi
For tonight this will be the end of my post. I hope you like it. If you have any suggestions or songs that think should be added write it down as a comment and I will check into it. Signing off until next time,
Captain Fun Something. Peace be with you all.